It’s way past time for an update here.  I haven’t taken the time to write a blog post in a while.  So much has been happening at church and in my personal life over the summer.  Some of it was really good and some of it not so good.  Yet, there is beauty in all of it.  Most of all, there is God in all of it.  It is what a friend of mine would call horrifically beautiful.

My friend, who also happens to be a United Methodist pastor, coined this term when she went home to the family farm to spend time with her mother who is currently battling cancer.  She described it something like this, “spending time in the most horrific of circumstances and knowing that God is there and making it beautiful.”  When I first heard it, it made me stop and take stock of everything.  When I did, I realized how truly accurate those words are.

I am not going to go into much detail as to what all has happened in my life lately.  Just suffice it to say, there is a lot of the horrifically beautiful as of late.  I am the first to admit that it is often hard to find God in the middle of it all.  But when I stop – even just briefly – to reflect, I can see the hands of God all over things that are otherwise horrific.  Never once in all of this has God failed me.  Now don’t get me wrong.  My life is not utopic.  Far from it.  My husband and I and our kids have seen our fair share of trials and tribulations.  I am just saying that if I really take time to step back from myself and my problems, I realize that God is there.

Even now as I type this, there are horrific things happening in the family.  Those things may not turn out the way I want them to.  In the end and to our human eyes and hearts, the horrific may seem to win out.  But you know what?  Even when the horrific seems victorious, there is beauty.  There is beauty when I am so stressed out from work that I can’t even think straight anymore.  That is when I hear Jesus telling me to slow down and rest when he says, “ Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)  There is beauty when personal and church  finances are tight and I flip to Philippians 4:19 to read “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus” and realize that is exactly what is happening (mind you, we don’t get everything wea want, but my needs and the church’s needs seem to always be taken care of).  There is even beauty in the horrific news that a loved one has stage four, inoperable cancer because I know that even this is temporary.  Will the result be the one that I would like?  Maybe, or maybe not.  It is too early in the process to really know.   But even here the fingerprints of God are all over the situation, and because they are, there is hope, comfort, and peace.

I don’t know that I have made the point I wanted to with this or not.  It is often so hard to put the things of God into human words.  Even so, I am putting this out there for you all.  Perhaps in doing so, you will take a few moments to stop for a minute or two and step back from the horrific that is happening in your life to ask yourself where the beauty is in this time and place.  When you do – when you really stop and look and place your faith and trust in God – then you, too, will see that God is always there and making your world horrifically beautiful just like God has done in mine.  May you always find that it is so!

And other than that, my friends, this pastor has nothing to say today!